Merry Christmas from New Zealand - 26/12/06

LOCAL

Brent Todd, former League player, was back in the news, this time for defrauding money from a pokie machine fundraiser. He hasn't had a great year, having been declared bankrupt and charged with drug offenses.

Police are investigating the sale of cellphones to inmates by their guards. Apparently the prisoners are miffed about the warranty terms.

New Zealand is now hosting the Netb all World Champs in November instead of Fiji in July. Other than that, the whole Fiji Coup thing now seems quite dull, the army continues to run things.

Cricket boss Martin Snedden, who has proven himself to be quite a capable administrator in times of crisis, has taken the job to run Rugby World Cup 2007.

Former small-time tv person Peter Verschaffelt has been charged with manufacturing P. What a git.

There was a massive swoop on gun collectors and dealers, although it sounds like they were all pretty shady, the initial reports suggested they had targetted people that were licensed but had obtained items their licenses didn't cover. I have a friend who runs a gun store, he was not impacted (although it did sound like he might have been).

A couple who were filmed in the aftermath of a car accident sued TVNZ for damages and failed. It seems that privacy does not extend particularly far in the face of the publics need to know. The footage was used in a reality show about firefighters. I would have thought their faces could be obscured or something.

There was a nasty drink driving accident in Dunedin where a car hit a pole so hard the its front and back touched when it wrapped itself around it. Neither person in the car survived.

WORLD NEWS

Scientists excavating in Spain have found fossilised remains of a new species of dinosaur called Turiasaurus riodevensis, a sauropod like Apatosaurus and brachiosaurus.

Iran is now being subjected to sanctions by the UN for it's work on enriching uranium. As the resolution was unanimous, this suggests North Korea agreed with them.

REAL SPORT

There was none to speak of, don't feel less busy because of it though.

SPORT

Not a lot of sport this week. Don't remember if the Aussies had already won the third test last Monday but they did. Ashes are now lost.

Shane Warne and Glen McGrath have both announced they will be retiring at the end of the Ashes series.

Man Utd won 3-0 over Villa, Arsenal beat Blackburn 6-2 (quite bizarre), Newcastle had 3-1 win over Spurs, Liverpool beat Watford 2-0, Chelsea beat Wigan 3-2 (Heskey did the damage for Wigan).

MY SAD LIFE

Forgot to mention Rory's school prizegiving, which was on the Wednesday we flew down to Nationals. Rory got prizes for Science, English, and PE, not very sure exactly what (biggest effort, most ejections, who knows). There is a rumour he also got a dance prize (although he didn't actually do dancing). Regardless, we haven't actually been told so who knows what he might have got. No sign of his NSW medal, either.

We saw the Goodins and Charles briefly on Wednesday and exchanged a few presents with the kids. Thomas recognised the shape of his, and was very excited. Was pretty cute and you do sort of forget what younger kids are like with presents.

Olwyn and Dave took off for Singapore on Friday to spend Christmas with Ben and Alex (although there are rumours that Roger and Shin might be there too).

On Saturday we drove down to Matarangi to stay near Penny, Craig, and the lads. Sunday we went to Cathedral Cove. Quite a drive from where we were, nice enough spot. Not entirely sure I see the appeal in random geological formations, but there you go. The kids made a row of over 100 sand castles from two buckets then kicked them over in 8.2 seconds.

Hannah, and to a lesser extent Rory, have been riding bikes down here a lot.

I got an email from Ian Mallinson in England, this morning. Nice to hear from you. Paul mentions what you are up to a fair bit. Hope everyone is keeping well in your part of the world..

Off to the Tucker house in a minute to go mad with present opening. Hope you all have a good Christmas. Be safe, relax, have fun. This is what we work for all year.

Back from Nationals in Wellington, tired and late (sorry) - 18/12/07

LOCAL NEWS

Well, the story about the pool made the news on Monday and the papers Tuesday. Rory got his picture on page 2 and was even on the front page of the Herald web site for a bit. Competition included a ten year old boy who fought off a small shark whilst surfing in Raglan, without question as to why he wasn't at school.

Another budget surplus for the government, $800m above expectation. That's a lot to be out by, but at least in a good direction.

Some controversy arose about using Australian agencies to regulate the health supplement industry here. I am not sure it matters, it's all bollocks anyway, I think it would hit the news if any of these snake oils actually did what they promised.

Three children died when a cliff collapsed on them in the Manawatu.

A New Zealand security guard died in a blast in Iraq.

Eight New Zealand fire-fighters were hurt while helping in Australia, three are still in hospital.

WORLD NEWS

The passing of Pinochet shows that the world is not always a fair place. I think it is generally accepted that he was a complete scumbag and escaped the punishment he truly deserved.

REAL SPORT

You don't want the blow by blow version of all seven games. Suffice to say that they improved steadily over the weekend. In summary:

Pool A
v Hutt A 9-3 win
V Waikato 11-5 win
Qualified top of Pool A

Pool E
v QE II 17-5 win
v Maranui 9-8 win

Semi Final
v Northsport (who beat them when they were gassed last Sunday) 5-4 win

Final
v Maranui 6-2 win

They didn't lose a game, and were never behind in any game. Rory scored a few goals, first goal in the final. The girls lost in the final, so got silver. Waitakere got the best overall result.

SPORT

Sri Lanka are giving New Zealand a bit of a thumping in second test. Probably finish today.

Aussie look to be in control in Third Ashes test.

Man Utd lost to West Ham 0-1, you have got to be kidding me. Chelsea beat Everton 3-2. Liverpool beat Charlton 3-0. Arse drew with Portsmouth 2-2.

MY SAD LIFE

Things were completely shambolic on Monday with calls from loads of people and calls to everyone in the team to ensure they were okay and sought medical attention if in any doubt. Then after the article on Tuesday there were more calls.

Wednesday, Rory and I left for Wellington and the house became a considerably quieter place. I am not very sure about what happened in Auckland but Hannah danced in four shows.

I kept the teams cellphones in my room. Two had alarms set, one at 3:15 one at 5am. I got woken twice before I ditched them in the lounge. Little buggers. They got up to plenty of mischief, the dodgy swimsuit calendar was hilarious (the boys posed in their swimsuits). They got little sleep last night. We are pretty pleased to be home, and the boys are national champions, which is pretty cool.

Between the semi and the final Rory was in bad shape, having trouble breathing, so we went to Hutt hospital. Turned out he had taken too much Ventolin. He has been fine without it ever since. I thought it could be a relapse of the issues a week ago, pretty relieved when it wasn't.

Sorry it is a bit short, more next week.

Dealing with localised chemical attacks, lots of people have nasty falls, and more fun in Fiji - 11/12/06

Sorry for lateness, I have an excuse.

LOCAL NEWS

I am a little concerned about the coverage of the coup in Fiji, which seems complete as of Tuesday. There was considerable glee from reporters as they thought they were witnessing something happening. I thought a journalist was meant to be a reasonably dispassionate observer.

A Danish woman fell 300m, hitting a few rocks on the way down. She was airlifted to Christchurch but failed to survive. No mention was made of how the rocks fared.

The guy that lost two legs and an arm in an altercation with a large shredder received $30,000 in compensation. He feels that isn't enough (surprise). At least he doesn't have to spend money on shoes.

A girl fell down a hole in the ground, but she was mostly okay.

A teenage male has disappeared, presumed dead, after falling off Lion Rock at Piha on Auckland's West Coast.

Reports of West Wave being closed due to water polo players falling ill are starting to come in. The news service says at least six boys were affected. Well, this proves you shouldn't believe everything you read in the paper. See My Sad Life for the real story.

While people were falling everywhere, interest rates did not on Thursday.

WORLD NEWS

The retirement of Greg Page, yellow and head Wiggle, was big news in Australia and New Zealand last week (sorry I am late with this). The kids used to love the Wiggles. Hannah spotted a Dorothy the Dinosaur dress in a department store in Sydney and whipped off her dress and put it on right at the rack in the store. We have a photo of her on Santa's knee without having paid for the dress. I think Mum bought it for her so we could leave (she didn't perform, but she was just so taken with it I don't think we had much of a choice).

More on Fiji. The Army commander, Frank Bananarama, appointed his personal physician as Prime Minister, and himself as El Presidente. I can't say I have heard anything substantial about his reasons for the coup. There have been no stories about corruption or incompetence. Perhaps somebody should tell him about this thing known as an "election". The first major fallout has been the removal of the Netball World Champs from Fiji, I suspect that is the tip of the iceberg.

One funny thing about the Fiji coup is that they show soldiers regularly on the telly with their M-16s and no magazines in them. They each given one bullet or something?

REAL SPORT

Didn't see Hannah's games in Tauranga, they lost 1-13 to a team they lost 0-19 to earlier so that was good. Never expected that to be a win. They lost 3rd/4th playoff 3-5 so came fourth. Still, not too shabby, shame they had to go to Tauranga for two losses though.

Rory's first game was against Marist who beat them convincingly about a month ago. Was close early on but we opened up a lead and won 7-3, Marist didn't score for last 12 minutes of a 20 minute game. That put them in the final.

What was left of the team (see below for more detail) lost 4-8 to Northsport. Disappointing a little, but given circumstances not a major cause for concern. So they won a silver medal, but nobody really cares. Quite sad, really, normally that would be considered not too bad, I think it is the best result of all six club U14 teams.

SPORT

After every news agency said the 2nd Ashes test looked like it would be a draw at the end of the fourth day, the Aussies took nine wickets in two sessions as England crumbled then proceeded to get the runs they needed to win at ODI speed. Ponting described it as the best win he'd been a part of. It was pretty impressive.

Conversely, the first test between New Zealand and Sri Lanka never looked like it would make the fourth day, wickets fell quite regularly. New Zealand won by 5 wickets but it was not hugely convincing. Some whinging about how last Sri Lankan got out for being a complete git, bit nobody cares.

Newcastle helped ruin Blackburn's season with a 3-1 win, Man Utd beat Man City 3-1, Spurs beat Charlton 5-1, Middlesbrough drew 1-1 with Wigan. Liverpool played Fulham and although goalless in the first half, Gerrard had a penalty saved but he managed to put the parried ball away to start the scoring, final score 4-0 to Liverpool. The Arse drew with Chelsea so Man Utd lead is becoming more real.

Big sports news was New Zealand team winning both races in that A1 GP thing in Indonesia or somewhere. Their first win and then their second the same weekend.

Next Ashes test starts this week.

MY SAD LIFE

Hannah had her interschool athletics on Tuesday. She didn't come anywhere exciting. High jump didn't go well, although she got a better shot-put throw than at school (6.93m) she was out-muscled by the big girls. She was the only palagi in the shot-put, too, which was kind of funny.

Putting on pants four times before 9am is never a good sign. That was how Wednesday started.

Hannah is running around the block, theoretically daily. Takes her around four minutes, it's about 900m. Her time is dropping pretty quickly.

Another minor event I forgot to mention was the Saturday of the water polo tournament. We had six girls come to our place between games. Rory was mortified. He called a friend and was out of the house in about two minutes. You can't comprehend how unusual this is, until you realise that it can take days for him to organise something with a friend normally. Seriously. Days. Later in the day he popped in to grab togs and disappeared again.

Wednesday was unusual. Put pants on four times by 9am. Diana had a flat tyre so I had to get pants on and go help. Then I had a shower. Put pants on inside out. Removed, inverted, re-entered. Then had to go out and had to change into formal jeans. Interesting morning.

Saturday the girls went to Tauranga so Rory and I were on our own. We went to see Borat, with Paul. It was okay, some pretty dodgy bits in it. Could have been better I think.

Spent a lot of the week wondering about whether I would get my new lens in time for Nationals. Haven't got it yet. Don't think I will get it in time now.

Sunday was interesting, as was most of today. Rory was not at all well after the game in the morning, coughing and was short of breath. At that point had no idea that others were also affected. Took him home, talk to my friend Matt (the Doctor) and pulled him out of the final so he stayed home. Went back to pool in my role as manager. The rest of the team weren't much better off. The pool had been given a shock treatment on Friday to kill off a nasty bacteria. However the cure seemed worse than the complaint. We knew of about four kids hospitalised last night, took Rory to A&E this morning because he was still short of breath. Ventolin seemed to reduce symptoms. Anyway, long story short all the teams that played in the dodgy pool on Sunday have been impacted on some level with National tournament starting this Thursday. I would guess about 20 have had medical attention now between the teams, possibly more. Not good, lots of emails flying around - pissed off parents, changing training times, all sorts. Been snowed today trying to figure a plan for training and things (hence late email now).

Had a random thought. Nobody who gets this email has ever died. You didn't know this was good for your health, did you?

Busy week coming with National U14 tournament. Monday next week could be late too. Sorry.

The philosophy of the Fubar and an overdue coup - 04/12/06

Sorry it is a little late, been busy this morning.

LOCAL NEWS

We had a bunch of spy chiefs here for the 50th anniversary of our SIS. It included heads of intelligence organisations including ASIO, the CIA, MI5, and MI6. Very hush hush, don't tell anyone.

The MPs managed to get themselves another pay rise.

A Tiger Moth crashed killing both aboard.

Don Brash surprised nobody when he announced he was to retire from parliament. Meanwhile we had news of another National MP that was punched at the U2 concert for smoking a cigar in a private box (he was a guest of the tobacco industry).

Fiji postponed their coup for a rugby game, it is planned for today. Seems to be running on island time.

Bit of a fuss over a wine entered in a competition being too different from the stuff you buy on the shelves. The vineyard is telling how it is natural variation between batches but the judges disagree. It's quite embarrassing but when you think about it most people probably buy it based on whether they liked it themselves rather than medals so I am not sure how bad it really is.

Meat can be murder, part 2. After the guy that stabbed himself while boning a deer a while back, we had a hunter fall off a cliff while chasing a pig, he died. No news of the pig but I think it is okay.

WORLD NEWS

Discussions attempting to avert a coup in Fiji continued.

Australia lost a helicopter and one soldier near Fiji on Wednesday.

A couple of New Zealanders helped restore our reputation by getting a shark attack victim to help in Western Australia.

Big typhoon in Philippines, but haven't heard a lot about it other than the fact that three kiwis are safe and 500 plus people aren't.

REAL SPORT

Hannah had North Island Intermediate champs this weekend. Played seven games in three days. They struggled, it is fair to say. They lost the first five games, then managed a win, which made no difference in their position but they really needed it for morale. I got Hannah to play in goal for two quarters in that game. She didn't let anything past. She worked very hard, she always does. She scored the first two goals in the tournament for the team, but did a lot of defending. In playoff for 6th and 7th, they lost on Sunday morning, but it was an improved score on the first game against that team.

We had club water polo prize giving last night. Rory got some certificates for refereeing and Hannah got most improved girl in Under 12s so she has a cup on her shelf.

SPORT

The Aussies are slowly catching up to the English in the second Ashes test but at the end of day three I think we are a long way from getting a result.

Arsenal beat Spurs 3-0, Blackburn managed a win over Fulham 2-0, Man Utd beat Middlesbrough 2-1, Liverpool had a big 4-0 win against Wigan. Chelsea v Newcastle not played yet.

Russia has won the Davis Cup in men's tennis.

Australian rookie Nathan Green won the New Zealand golf open, Michael Campbell and a few others came second.

MY SAD LIFE

Gavin and Yana are now Mr & Mrs Cosh. They had a little thing on Saturday night. I took some photos at the rose garden in Parnell first. They are now the proud recipients of what I believe is the first ever Fubar given as a wedding present. You see, most people get toasters for a wedding present. Giving a Fubar provides a good alternative to the toaster, and offers a fun solution for having too many toasters. See next bit for more on Fubars.

Gavin also informed us that he is pregnant. Don't actually know when he is due, he told Diana. Middle of year sometime I guess. Yana is suffering from morning sickness. Wonder when Gavin will start having the chest burster dreams. Nobody ever warns you about those.

A Fubar is a tool that looks like an angry nutcracker, made by Stanley. Rory instantly fell in love with one, he destroyed many things, mostly tin cans, with one on Thursday. On Thursday night on the way to training, Rory was pointing out various inanimate (mostly) objects and what a Fubar could do to change their shape. They are cool, simple as that. No idea what you actually need one for, just know that you need one. Rory is planning to learn a form of martial arts known as "Kung Fubar", and possibly another one know as "Fubar Jitsu". The word fubar is an acronym from the army (fouled up beyond all recognition). Rory and I have tons of ideas for advertisements for Fubars. We have been trying to compile a list of problems that cannot be solved with a Fubar. So far the only one is this: having too many Fubars.

Caitlin broke her arm then unbroke it in the last few weeks. We understand a Fubar was not involved. Haven't seen the Goodins for a while now. I think they still exist.

Today is Charles' birthday, yesterday was mine. We didn't really have a chance to celebrate it, not that it needed celebration. I got a book and a radio, and I suppose you could argue that I got myself a Fubar (although Rory sleeps with it under his pillow). It was Ben's sixth birthday last Monday.

Rory has exams this week at school. His first set of exams ever, really. Will be interesting, they are quite important in terms of what he does next year.

Hannah has stayed home today, she is still asleep.

I hope to get my new lens this week. Was hoping for it in time for tournament over the weekend but no luck there. It has big f-stop thingy.

That'll do for now.