Well, after all the drama with Ollie, Pandora decided to chase an enemy cat off the property last night and got hit by a car. We got a phone call about 7pm last night (they have name tags now). Diana and Rory took her to the vet, she should be okay, we find out more this morning when we transfer her to the regular vet at 8am. Jaw mostly (common injury, happened to our cat Trouble a few days before we got married) but they didn't know about internals last night.
LOCAL NEWS
A bizarre incident at a gas station near Napier. A guy thumped the hood of a car as he walked past, the owner of the car took exception to this and hit the guy with his car a couple of time. The driver was arrested and the pedestrian is in hospital with pretty serious injuries.
A whacking great red bull, known (cleverly) as "big red" died during surgery this week. The thing stood about two metres high and would have looked pretty scary in any well though of Remuera China Shop.
A woman that left her children at home while she picked up her husband from the pub (then stayed a couple of hours and drank and played pool) has been sentenced to 18 months in prison. While she was gone, the house caught fire and two of the three children died. The third was rescued by drunk husband but suffered 20% burns, the drunk husband died trying to rescue the others. Home detention is on offer so she can stay with the surviving child. Whilst it is a truly tragic thing, and punishing the child again doesn't seem fair, one wonders if being left in the care of his mother is actually a kind thing to do given her previous behaviour.
A three year old was lost overnight in bush was found cuddling his dog for warmth. Gavin thinks it is unfair that a dog attacking someone is front page news but when one saves the life of a child it doesn't get much airtime. I think they should stop referring to them as dog attacks and call them "rottweiler attacks" or whatever the breed is. You'd never see a Labrador attack in the paper.
After the continuous and dull scandal of Ahmed Zaoui, the potential terrorist that has been held in a New Zealand jail for 500 days, we now supposedly have two Israeli Nationals involved in a passport scam and they reckon they work for Mossad. Our poor immigration people just won't be able to cope. After the attack on the Hamas leader, Helen may have to be careful about how she slaps the Israeli wrists.
Some scientists have decided that maybe the spray they kill moths with is bad for some people. You think?
A man who lost his life two years ago while saving two boys from drowning is to receive a certificate from the Royal Humane Society. I am sure that will help his family considerably. Now everyone knows you get a certificate for that, people will be diving in to rescue people in the water at the drop of a swimming cap.
WORLD NEWS
George is keeping his toy soldiers in Iraq for another three months.
Europe is not bowing to Osama's suggestion to leave Muslim countries alone and he'll leave them alone. I think Osama might be George Bush Senior's bastard love child and that is why he doesn't like George Junior. If it is true, he shouldn't be so bitter. Yes, GW is president of the free world, but Osama got the looks and the brains.
Israel's execution of the Hamas Leader is not going to settle things down. When will they ever learn, you have to wonder.
Whatever Mr and Mrs Beckham (or anyone else for that matter) do in their bedroom or anyone else's is up to them, I don't care, it's not my business, and it's not sport news either.
REAL SPORT
We had two friendly games on Saturday, one for Hannah, one for Rory. Diana and I were the only two that had divided attention with the two games going on at once. Hannah's game was between girls from her team and another club team, although most of the players were from Hannah's team. Rory's game was a mixture of boys from the whole of 12th grade (those that were around).
Hannah scored the opening goal for her team, and shot from anywhere but didn't score again, although her team won 12-0. One girl was feeling ill, but had insisted that the family don't stay the night in Rotorua as planned and come home in time for it. She scored seven goals. Rory's team lost 6-4, but Rory scored two goals, I saw one and it was a nice shot that the goalie should have got to but avoided it because of the speed.
Everyone had a good time, it was sunny, parents all sat or stood in the sun and watched (while I hovered between both games, having an interest in both). The kids were all red-faced at the end. We ran the games for an hour and a half.
SPORT
The Blues got insult and injury at the hands of the Stormers and have no hope of a semi-final spot now. About four players were injured early in the game and they got thumped. The Chiefs won away to the Sharks, the Hurricanes lost to the Waratahs. The Bulls beat the Reds, who should be very embarrassed. The Crusaders just beat Cats.
Brian Lara's quadruple century against England was pretty impressive. Lucky he was the captain so he could declare after he got it. At least it was against a proper team.
The Propecia Rally of New Zealand has been going over the weekend. Wake me up when it's finished. Petter Solberg won (I think).
Man Utd lost to Portsmouth (how could they) and Chelsea had a 0-0 with Everton, so Arsenal are in the box seat for the premiership already after thumping hapless Leeds 5-0. Newcastle were down to 10 men after ten minutes but held on for a 0-0 draw with Villa.
Warriors have lost five of six games now.
MY SAD LIFE
The Goodins have been married sixteen long years, as of Friday.
On Saturday, it was my Father's birthday, his first since he died.
Gavin had some fun with his thumb this week. After a nine hour session at Middlemore on Thursday, he got his thumb rebroken twice (at least there was anaesthetic the first time). Funnily enough, he's still off work.
Rory's finger is still a bit tender but is okay, I think.
Gavin's flatmates got a puppy this week. It's a lab cross, a boy called Chino (named after a type of trousers).
The kids took Gavin to Armageddon on Friday, they didn't spend a lot of time there, so it can't have been that good. They went to see Scooby Doo 2 as well. I didn't go, didn't have a chance, first time I have been to it in many years.
Went to the Avondale flea market with the kids on Sunday morning, after heaps of nagging from Hannah for a couple of weeks. Rory didn't want to go, but returned with a few things that he was very happy with. Hannah bought some Russian fudge and not much else.
Did my radio thing again yesterday, going to be the first Sunday of the month from now on. Was interrupted by three trotting races, first time that's happened.
The kittens had been really good this week after having the cat door fully functional. No more chasing them around the garden and getting them inside. Ollie is really cute, he comes inside and finds Hannah and has big cuddles with her.
Well, better go, have a meeting to attend.
Rob
OPTIONAL RANT - LEGALISING GAY MARRIAGES
The whole thing with gay marriages seems to be continuously on the news. In one of those moments when my brain was unoccupied it occurred to me that marriage is in many ways like being joint shareholders in a company. So why not form a company called "Jeremy & Cecil Ltd" and run everything out of it? Then they could put all marital assets into the company and have rights that are very similar to husband and wife. That would really screw up the governments and their taxation revenue if gay couples started deducting all sorts of expenses and things. Hitting the government in the wallet might be enough to motivate them to stop continuing with a bizarre law. Frankly, given my own view on weddings, I wonder whether the company could run it as a "client function" and make the wedding and honeymoon tax deductible. Personally, I think it is a ridiculous thing that people who clearly aren't gay have a problem with gay marriage. Whilst I don't intend to ever enter into such an arrangement, as long as it isn't made compulsory I don't give a toss about whether it's legal or not. I have a real problem with various groups with no interest wanting to prevent it from being legalised. I am also sick of hearing about it.
19 April 2004
12 April 2004
Happy Easter - 12/04/04
Well, life is tough when you get a four day weekend.
LOCAL NEWS
An elderly woman got bashed for money about a week ago and then died of her injuries this week. It was a bit suspect because she had $7000 in travellers cheques and Euros on her, which is more than what an average pensioner would carry. Cause of death was heart failure, but family felt it was brought on by injuries (she was in hospital for nearly a week so should have been recovering, you would think). I reckoned it had to be someone she knew (they drove away in an old red BMW, so they might have been a sharebroker in the 80s).
A handicapped man who built a rifle into a crutch took his 8 year old son hunting based on his memory of a trip 30 years earlier, surprisingly got lost in the bush for two nights in cold conditions. They didn't say whether he was physically or mentally handicapped, but I think it is safe from the evidence to assume both. Why the idiot wasn't slapped with a whopping great bill for the search, I don't know. I have a real problem with the lack of user pays with surf, sea, and bush rescue.
An Easter Show worker died when he fell off a ride while checking the tracks. Funnily enough, the ride is now closed. I suspect patronage of other dodgy rides will have been higher because of the added danger. The Easter Show has been going for 161 years, and much of the sideshow equipment doesn't look a day over a hundred and fifty.
Someone in Kawerau (small town in Bay of Plenty) won the Lotto powerball, to the tune of $14.5 million. Even in New Zealand dollars, that's not bad. I just wish the full page story on it would mention that people bought $126.4 million worth of tickets to create that prize, and maybe point out your chances of winning it are so low that it is more likely you will bury a dog pooh in the garden and dig it up ten years later and find a nugget of gold (well, if you live in South Africa, maybe).
Auckland City Council parking wardens are now posting parking infringement notices to car owners. I am not sure that's particularly fair when they do it to people sitting in their cars - who are supposed to be asked to move along before they are ticketed.
WORLD NEWS
GW seems to be gearing up for his re-election. It will be interesting, quite embarrassing for him to not get back in after his efforts for the free world. News that they were warned about 9/11 will do nothing to help his chances. Funny thing is, if they had prevented it, nobody would have really cared or believed what might have happened. It would have been a non-event.
Meanwhile, Iraq appears to be turning into GW's Vietnam, Watergate, and pork cigar controversy all at once. I wish him all the best for re-election, I really do.
REAL SPORT
There was no real sport due to Easter.
SPORT
The Blues won 56-19 over the Bulls, the Brumbies thumped the Highlanders 50-18, the Sharks beat the Crusaders and the Chiefs lost to someone. Not a great weekend for the New Zealand teams.
Man Utd had a win, Arsenal drew 0-0 with Newcastle, Chelsea had a draw too. Leeds are now third from bottom but on the same points as Portsmouth and Blackburn (but behind massively on goal difference). There is hope for them, after all.
The Warriors lost again. That's one win from five.
MY SAD LIFE
Rory hurt his finger on Monday, little finger, left hand, suspected break but probably very minor. He has it taped up but couldn't go to water polo on Tuesday. Good timing in that soccer would not have been a goer and we have a break from it anyway.
Diana was suffering from the 'flu for most of the week, not really bad, but enough to slow her down. It took ages for her to make dinner (joking, sort of). I think I had it a little but not too bad.
I heard from Helen in Geelong that she has bought a house and moves in some time in May. She mentioned something about sitting a fan in front of a block of ice (to keep cool, I presume). I've never heard of such a concept, but maybe it works. Might try it next summer.
Charles is over here, visiting his mother and acting as the consulting engineer on the Goodin Barbecue Construction project. This took quite a bit of effort. There was confusion as to which model it was, the instructions continuously said things like "attach this if you have a Monaco" and "don't forget to connect the grommet if you have the Beelzebub". We found out what model it was when someone pointed out it was written on one of the last pieces to go on the sodding thing. It looked like it might take pride of place in the garage, usurping the beetle, but that was short-lived. The kids made a kitty playground out of the cardboard boxes which kept them entertained nearly as long as the barbecue building entertained Ross, Charles, and I (and considerably longer than it entertained the kitty). We test-fired it and nothing exploded, so that was good. It is a six-burner plus wok-thingy so needs a gas bottle the size of a Mini. It takes about four minutes to walk around it and three people to lift it over steps. Charles felt the brakes on two wheels were rather superfluous as it required considerable effort to make it go anywhere, he had a point. Ross isn't sure he has enough friends to justify a barbecue this big, which is practically visible from space (like the fence he once built).
We met Judy's new puppy on Sunday. She is a beagle, and is going to be called Sophie (I think). Very cute, huge tummy, short legs, massive ears, sharp teeth. Goes mad for a while, chews everything in reach, luckily reach isn't that good yet. Then it runs out of power. It's bite is definitely worse than it's bark. It's funny to see a puppy so soon after seeing kittens. The differences are quite marked, but the pre-programmed behaviour in puppies versus kittens is quite funny to observe (like how dogs pull on things with their teeth and cats sharpen their claws, it's just things they do).
Gavin's not going to be buying a business and has sensibly reached the conclusion that starting from scratch would be lower risk than buying from someone else.
Hey Jono, how are you going? You've been quiet.
Peter is away again this week, so work will be murder. He scored a goal on Saturday, for the other team (I hate it when that happens).
Gavin's flatmate is babysitting so I expect to see him today for some refuge time.
Our cats have started using the cat door so things are a bit easier, they come and go as they please and we don't have to get them inside before we go out any more. Ollie is making a habit of eating Pandora's crickets, it happened again yesterday morning, very quickly.
Kids are on holiday for the next two weeks so no quiet time for me and Diana, and probably no walks.
Well, this feels very low-key this week. I will pull my socks up next week.
LOCAL NEWS
An elderly woman got bashed for money about a week ago and then died of her injuries this week. It was a bit suspect because she had $7000 in travellers cheques and Euros on her, which is more than what an average pensioner would carry. Cause of death was heart failure, but family felt it was brought on by injuries (she was in hospital for nearly a week so should have been recovering, you would think). I reckoned it had to be someone she knew (they drove away in an old red BMW, so they might have been a sharebroker in the 80s).
A handicapped man who built a rifle into a crutch took his 8 year old son hunting based on his memory of a trip 30 years earlier, surprisingly got lost in the bush for two nights in cold conditions. They didn't say whether he was physically or mentally handicapped, but I think it is safe from the evidence to assume both. Why the idiot wasn't slapped with a whopping great bill for the search, I don't know. I have a real problem with the lack of user pays with surf, sea, and bush rescue.
An Easter Show worker died when he fell off a ride while checking the tracks. Funnily enough, the ride is now closed. I suspect patronage of other dodgy rides will have been higher because of the added danger. The Easter Show has been going for 161 years, and much of the sideshow equipment doesn't look a day over a hundred and fifty.
Someone in Kawerau (small town in Bay of Plenty) won the Lotto powerball, to the tune of $14.5 million. Even in New Zealand dollars, that's not bad. I just wish the full page story on it would mention that people bought $126.4 million worth of tickets to create that prize, and maybe point out your chances of winning it are so low that it is more likely you will bury a dog pooh in the garden and dig it up ten years later and find a nugget of gold (well, if you live in South Africa, maybe).
Auckland City Council parking wardens are now posting parking infringement notices to car owners. I am not sure that's particularly fair when they do it to people sitting in their cars - who are supposed to be asked to move along before they are ticketed.
WORLD NEWS
GW seems to be gearing up for his re-election. It will be interesting, quite embarrassing for him to not get back in after his efforts for the free world. News that they were warned about 9/11 will do nothing to help his chances. Funny thing is, if they had prevented it, nobody would have really cared or believed what might have happened. It would have been a non-event.
Meanwhile, Iraq appears to be turning into GW's Vietnam, Watergate, and pork cigar controversy all at once. I wish him all the best for re-election, I really do.
REAL SPORT
There was no real sport due to Easter.
SPORT
The Blues won 56-19 over the Bulls, the Brumbies thumped the Highlanders 50-18, the Sharks beat the Crusaders and the Chiefs lost to someone. Not a great weekend for the New Zealand teams.
Man Utd had a win, Arsenal drew 0-0 with Newcastle, Chelsea had a draw too. Leeds are now third from bottom but on the same points as Portsmouth and Blackburn (but behind massively on goal difference). There is hope for them, after all.
The Warriors lost again. That's one win from five.
MY SAD LIFE
Rory hurt his finger on Monday, little finger, left hand, suspected break but probably very minor. He has it taped up but couldn't go to water polo on Tuesday. Good timing in that soccer would not have been a goer and we have a break from it anyway.
Diana was suffering from the 'flu for most of the week, not really bad, but enough to slow her down. It took ages for her to make dinner (joking, sort of). I think I had it a little but not too bad.
I heard from Helen in Geelong that she has bought a house and moves in some time in May. She mentioned something about sitting a fan in front of a block of ice (to keep cool, I presume). I've never heard of such a concept, but maybe it works. Might try it next summer.
Charles is over here, visiting his mother and acting as the consulting engineer on the Goodin Barbecue Construction project. This took quite a bit of effort. There was confusion as to which model it was, the instructions continuously said things like "attach this if you have a Monaco" and "don't forget to connect the grommet if you have the Beelzebub". We found out what model it was when someone pointed out it was written on one of the last pieces to go on the sodding thing. It looked like it might take pride of place in the garage, usurping the beetle, but that was short-lived. The kids made a kitty playground out of the cardboard boxes which kept them entertained nearly as long as the barbecue building entertained Ross, Charles, and I (and considerably longer than it entertained the kitty). We test-fired it and nothing exploded, so that was good. It is a six-burner plus wok-thingy so needs a gas bottle the size of a Mini. It takes about four minutes to walk around it and three people to lift it over steps. Charles felt the brakes on two wheels were rather superfluous as it required considerable effort to make it go anywhere, he had a point. Ross isn't sure he has enough friends to justify a barbecue this big, which is practically visible from space (like the fence he once built).
We met Judy's new puppy on Sunday. She is a beagle, and is going to be called Sophie (I think). Very cute, huge tummy, short legs, massive ears, sharp teeth. Goes mad for a while, chews everything in reach, luckily reach isn't that good yet. Then it runs out of power. It's bite is definitely worse than it's bark. It's funny to see a puppy so soon after seeing kittens. The differences are quite marked, but the pre-programmed behaviour in puppies versus kittens is quite funny to observe (like how dogs pull on things with their teeth and cats sharpen their claws, it's just things they do).
Gavin's not going to be buying a business and has sensibly reached the conclusion that starting from scratch would be lower risk than buying from someone else.
Hey Jono, how are you going? You've been quiet.
Peter is away again this week, so work will be murder. He scored a goal on Saturday, for the other team (I hate it when that happens).
Gavin's flatmate is babysitting so I expect to see him today for some refuge time.
Our cats have started using the cat door so things are a bit easier, they come and go as they please and we don't have to get them inside before we go out any more. Ollie is making a habit of eating Pandora's crickets, it happened again yesterday morning, very quickly.
Kids are on holiday for the next two weeks so no quiet time for me and Diana, and probably no walks.
Well, this feels very low-key this week. I will pull my socks up next week.
5 April 2004
The fine print - 05/04/04
LOCAL NEWS
Lesley Martin was found guilty of manslaughter in the euthanasia case. I have to say that the impression I got from much of the news was that she acted a little too quickly for comfort. I know people can go downhill fast but many who should have known better felt that Martin's mother wasn't quite a candidate for the exit door when it happened.
A big hydro-electric project called "aqua" was canned this week. This has caused the share price of other power companies to rise.
Local writer Michael King was killed in a car accident on Tuesday. He wrote a history of New Zealand that was published last year the same week my book was published.
MP Nick Smith was fined $5,000 for contempt of court.
Another moron decided risking death and running from police was better than getting a speeding ticket and promptly killed himself. This guy was 35, and should have known better. Darwinian evolution at it's best.
There is talk of banning cell phone use by drivers in cars. What a crock. Even with handsfree things, which is stupid. I don't get distracted by the call when driving, I get distracted by the driving when on a call - meaning if something happens that needs my attention on the road, it gets it. Are they going to ban me skipping songs on my iPod? Entering information in my PDA? Eating my sandwich? Doing my lipstick? (okay, someone else doing their lipstick). The latest accident involving a cell phone was an 18yo who was texting someone whilst driving. Again, that's evolution, folks (as long as they don't take you out when they kill themselves, why should you care?).
SPEAKING OF DARWINIAN EVOLUTION
I was thinking about the size of crayfish and snapper the other day. You'd think ones that only grew to a size just below the legal limit would become dominant versions of the species and you'd get a bunch of pygmy fish and crays out there that people wouldn't be allowed to ever catch. I don't think it's happened, but I wonder why not?
WORLD NEWS
Another explosion in Spain, this time as police raided a house with suspects of the Madrid bombing. They blew themselves and a couple of police up (was it an attempt to get away, like the boy racer?).
The mistrial in the Tyco fraud case is bizarre. Couldn't they discharge the problem juror and run with 11?
REAL SPORT
Awesome start to the season for the Clarke children (including the big one).
With Hannah's team, I generously donated two players to the other team, who played better for the other team than they did for us. Pearl is our best defender and she played for them in the second half. We were all over the really but couldn't pass and make space. Our problem was only one player was defending which wasn't enough, although we let one in it was sooo offside a blind man noticed (and both linesman). Finally, when it should have been full time three minutes earlier, Britt put one into the goal at the other end and gave us a 1-0 win (her first goal in about four seasons of playing). They didn't win a single game last year, the Dragons, so winning first up was awesome for morale.
Rory's team were playing a team they beat 6-1 last year, so despite being under prepared they had a good chance. It took about ten minutes before they scored. They were leading 2-0 at half time, then 3-0 in the second half before conceding a goal near the end for a 3-1 win. I think Rory's increase in height and speed will make him a much better player this year. A guy was yelling too much at Rory's game, talking to the players, getting them to wake up and think about what they were doing. The coach came over and asked me to calm down. But seriously, I found it very hard to be a quiet observer (well, okay, impossible).
No game for another three weeks with Easter and school holidays.
SPORT
The Black Caps lost the final test to South Africa, after having looked like they would lose, then win, then lose, resulting in a drawn series. Shame, really, but not the end of the world.
The Super 12 produced some better results for New Zealand teams this week. The Chiefs beat the Highlanders but they got two bonus points so maximum points gained in the game. The Crusaders easily beat the Brumbies, and the Hurricanes dealt to the Reds. The third Australia v New Zealand games was the Blues and the Waratahs on Sunday, the Blues won but didn't get a bonus point. Eight of the top nine teams are within two points of each other so it's pretty close for getting a place in the finals.
Highlight of the weekend was Paul Scholes scoring in the 32nd minute to give Man Utd a 1-0 win over the Arse in the FA Cup semi-final. There is some light at the end of the tunnel. Milwall beat Sunderland in the other semi so I don't have a conflict with who to support (I used to like Sunderland (after they won the 1973 FA Cup, which is why Rory decided on Man Utd when they beat Newcastle in 1999). If Man Utd lose to Milwall, Sir Alex might be looking for work.
The Warriors finally had a win, Manly must be complete crap.
MY SAD LIFE
Sorry about this next bit, it's very long, but it's more for my benefit than anyone else (actually, some would argue that for everything that goes into these emails).
I have been waiting for my first royalty cheque ever since I wrote the digital photography book, which I finished 1st June last year and was printed in October. It was due in March, but hadn't arrived. Come 1st April I was getting pretty pissed off about the whole thing. I even re-read the contract and looked for some relief, which I couldn't find. I think the key thing was that I should have read the contract thoroughly when I first got it (and shouldn't have started the book until I did), I sort of read it quickly and figured it seemed the same as the previous one so didn't give it a hard look. Big mistake, huge. I have nobody to blame but myself, but with the timing of the book and the contract I was virtually half done on the book before I had the contract to sign, so it was a bit late to question things anyway. Really crap parts include that fact that it wasn't a third up front, on delivery, and on printing, like the first one. I got a piddly little amount up front and had to wait until April 1 (irony there) to get any more. Even worse, the contract entitles the publisher to retain 20% of the royalty as a reserve against returns of books, which they don't have to pay me until October 2005 (I am hoping that exchange rate fluctuations might increase the value of it by then). This felt pretty rugged given that I had arranged for one company to buy 5000 copies of the book on day one and they had no right of return, they agreed and are going to top up the payment. Even so, they have done very little to push the book, and people can't buy it if they don't know it's out there and it isn't on the shelf. Rubbing salt into the wound, I agreed to doing the radio show for 12 months on Wednesday, and was feeling very reluctant to mention the book on the show, let alone Random House. The contract entitles them to take any other books I want to write (subject to finding agreeable terms, like that will happen). Their lack of enthusiasm for marketing the book means that I cannot write a second edition until the stocks are gone, which at current sales out to retailers should be some time in 2012. This means there will effectively be no second edition or new version. I am not prepared to do one under a contract like this, I would want to have some say in the promotion of it, it should be sold in other countries (500 copies of this one were sent to Australia) and the existing contract effectively extinguishes any possibility of that. I was very pleased with this book, it was something that I felt looked very good and was much less boring than the ones on accounting software and Word & Excel. I cannot begin to describe how disappointed and violated I felt about it (I am getting over it, though). It's like I have had something precious taken away, and have to say I seriously doubt that I will ever bother writing another. I think I can now relate to people talking about wanting editorial control and wanting a say in the material they produce. I guess my advice to myself and you is this: read the bloody contract and don't write a word until you do.
I've since spoken to a couple of other people who have written books and felt that the whole thing was a singularly disappointing and unrewarding experience. That helped.
Rory had a performance thing at school on Thursday. There were heaps of kids in it that we knew, including Bob's son Nico (the whole extended family were there), my PC World Editor (her son goes to the school), plus the Cohens and masses of soccer people. Rory did very well, played the drums quite boringly then let rip a couple of times which was way better than some of the other drummers. He wore the bird mask that I helped Ross Cole do last year for the school production. It is getting a bit tight on him, but still looks like a pretty good prop.
Got a nice letter from the guy in prison thanking me for my response. Silly how little things make you feel good.
I think Brett celebrates a birthday this week on the 7th in Perth, where they are busily checking out Murrilitheran's action at the university using completely ridiculous methods that were used in filming LOTR (lots of dodgy bowling actions in those movies, I was saying so just the other day). Somebody said that filming a dodgy bowler in controlled conditions with little lights stuck to him is like sitting a convicted criminal next to a VCR and saying he isn't guilty if it's still there in the morning. What absolute bollocks. He's a cheat.
My business partner, Peter, turned 40 on Saturday. We've been working together for like 14 years. Am I getting old or is my memory getting better? The cook was obviously a serial one, not parallel, as the mains for 13 people arrived one after the other and the guy next to me had basically finished his by the time Diana's arrived. That being said, it meant those not eating could talk and vice versa when the other meals arrived. Not sure it was deliberately planned that way.
Gavin broke his thumb on Wednesday night and bought a business on Thursday. Busy 24 hours for him, really. Then, on Sunday, he told the vendor he could stick his business up his wazoo if he wasn't going to cooperate during the due diligence phase, and fair enough too. It's like a soap opera, without the kissing and unwanted pregnancies but lots of evil people and big money deals.
Charles felt that Rory's story on the trip to Glinks was excellent, and he suggested that Rory got his writing skill from his mother. I hear he's coming over for a visit. I can hit him then.
The Goodins have acquired another kitten, very small, and a bit overwhelmed yesterday but starting to settle down. Polly is cat-sized now and a bit scary for it (called Molly but not sure how long for). Our kids had a rare swim (this summer) in the Goodins pool. Diana played Thelma and Louise with Kathryn on Saturday when they went to see an art exhibition by the mother of one of Rory's friends in Kath's new convertible beetle. I took it for a little drive with a bunch of kids in it, it's quite nice to drive (even with three kids in it). Rory asked if he could have a go (god loves a tryer). Nothing like having the old top down. Luckily, I didn't go on the motorway or bugs would have been hitting me in the forehead. It's not red, though (only two colours of cars, red and not red).
Rory told us a very good little joke he got from school:
Q: How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Two, but don't ask me how they get inside.
Response from one person was, yes, but they'd be really screwed if someone turned the light on.
I am sure there were a couple of other things I was supposed to mention.
There always is.
Lesley Martin was found guilty of manslaughter in the euthanasia case. I have to say that the impression I got from much of the news was that she acted a little too quickly for comfort. I know people can go downhill fast but many who should have known better felt that Martin's mother wasn't quite a candidate for the exit door when it happened.
A big hydro-electric project called "aqua" was canned this week. This has caused the share price of other power companies to rise.
Local writer Michael King was killed in a car accident on Tuesday. He wrote a history of New Zealand that was published last year the same week my book was published.
MP Nick Smith was fined $5,000 for contempt of court.
Another moron decided risking death and running from police was better than getting a speeding ticket and promptly killed himself. This guy was 35, and should have known better. Darwinian evolution at it's best.
There is talk of banning cell phone use by drivers in cars. What a crock. Even with handsfree things, which is stupid. I don't get distracted by the call when driving, I get distracted by the driving when on a call - meaning if something happens that needs my attention on the road, it gets it. Are they going to ban me skipping songs on my iPod? Entering information in my PDA? Eating my sandwich? Doing my lipstick? (okay, someone else doing their lipstick). The latest accident involving a cell phone was an 18yo who was texting someone whilst driving. Again, that's evolution, folks (as long as they don't take you out when they kill themselves, why should you care?).
SPEAKING OF DARWINIAN EVOLUTION
I was thinking about the size of crayfish and snapper the other day. You'd think ones that only grew to a size just below the legal limit would become dominant versions of the species and you'd get a bunch of pygmy fish and crays out there that people wouldn't be allowed to ever catch. I don't think it's happened, but I wonder why not?
WORLD NEWS
Another explosion in Spain, this time as police raided a house with suspects of the Madrid bombing. They blew themselves and a couple of police up (was it an attempt to get away, like the boy racer?).
The mistrial in the Tyco fraud case is bizarre. Couldn't they discharge the problem juror and run with 11?
REAL SPORT
Awesome start to the season for the Clarke children (including the big one).
With Hannah's team, I generously donated two players to the other team, who played better for the other team than they did for us. Pearl is our best defender and she played for them in the second half. We were all over the really but couldn't pass and make space. Our problem was only one player was defending which wasn't enough, although we let one in it was sooo offside a blind man noticed (and both linesman). Finally, when it should have been full time three minutes earlier, Britt put one into the goal at the other end and gave us a 1-0 win (her first goal in about four seasons of playing). They didn't win a single game last year, the Dragons, so winning first up was awesome for morale.
Rory's team were playing a team they beat 6-1 last year, so despite being under prepared they had a good chance. It took about ten minutes before they scored. They were leading 2-0 at half time, then 3-0 in the second half before conceding a goal near the end for a 3-1 win. I think Rory's increase in height and speed will make him a much better player this year. A guy was yelling too much at Rory's game, talking to the players, getting them to wake up and think about what they were doing. The coach came over and asked me to calm down. But seriously, I found it very hard to be a quiet observer (well, okay, impossible).
No game for another three weeks with Easter and school holidays.
SPORT
The Black Caps lost the final test to South Africa, after having looked like they would lose, then win, then lose, resulting in a drawn series. Shame, really, but not the end of the world.
The Super 12 produced some better results for New Zealand teams this week. The Chiefs beat the Highlanders but they got two bonus points so maximum points gained in the game. The Crusaders easily beat the Brumbies, and the Hurricanes dealt to the Reds. The third Australia v New Zealand games was the Blues and the Waratahs on Sunday, the Blues won but didn't get a bonus point. Eight of the top nine teams are within two points of each other so it's pretty close for getting a place in the finals.
Highlight of the weekend was Paul Scholes scoring in the 32nd minute to give Man Utd a 1-0 win over the Arse in the FA Cup semi-final. There is some light at the end of the tunnel. Milwall beat Sunderland in the other semi so I don't have a conflict with who to support (I used to like Sunderland (after they won the 1973 FA Cup, which is why Rory decided on Man Utd when they beat Newcastle in 1999). If Man Utd lose to Milwall, Sir Alex might be looking for work.
The Warriors finally had a win, Manly must be complete crap.
MY SAD LIFE
Sorry about this next bit, it's very long, but it's more for my benefit than anyone else (actually, some would argue that for everything that goes into these emails).
I have been waiting for my first royalty cheque ever since I wrote the digital photography book, which I finished 1st June last year and was printed in October. It was due in March, but hadn't arrived. Come 1st April I was getting pretty pissed off about the whole thing. I even re-read the contract and looked for some relief, which I couldn't find. I think the key thing was that I should have read the contract thoroughly when I first got it (and shouldn't have started the book until I did), I sort of read it quickly and figured it seemed the same as the previous one so didn't give it a hard look. Big mistake, huge. I have nobody to blame but myself, but with the timing of the book and the contract I was virtually half done on the book before I had the contract to sign, so it was a bit late to question things anyway. Really crap parts include that fact that it wasn't a third up front, on delivery, and on printing, like the first one. I got a piddly little amount up front and had to wait until April 1 (irony there) to get any more. Even worse, the contract entitles the publisher to retain 20% of the royalty as a reserve against returns of books, which they don't have to pay me until October 2005 (I am hoping that exchange rate fluctuations might increase the value of it by then). This felt pretty rugged given that I had arranged for one company to buy 5000 copies of the book on day one and they had no right of return, they agreed and are going to top up the payment. Even so, they have done very little to push the book, and people can't buy it if they don't know it's out there and it isn't on the shelf. Rubbing salt into the wound, I agreed to doing the radio show for 12 months on Wednesday, and was feeling very reluctant to mention the book on the show, let alone Random House. The contract entitles them to take any other books I want to write (subject to finding agreeable terms, like that will happen). Their lack of enthusiasm for marketing the book means that I cannot write a second edition until the stocks are gone, which at current sales out to retailers should be some time in 2012. This means there will effectively be no second edition or new version. I am not prepared to do one under a contract like this, I would want to have some say in the promotion of it, it should be sold in other countries (500 copies of this one were sent to Australia) and the existing contract effectively extinguishes any possibility of that. I was very pleased with this book, it was something that I felt looked very good and was much less boring than the ones on accounting software and Word & Excel. I cannot begin to describe how disappointed and violated I felt about it (I am getting over it, though). It's like I have had something precious taken away, and have to say I seriously doubt that I will ever bother writing another. I think I can now relate to people talking about wanting editorial control and wanting a say in the material they produce. I guess my advice to myself and you is this: read the bloody contract and don't write a word until you do.
I've since spoken to a couple of other people who have written books and felt that the whole thing was a singularly disappointing and unrewarding experience. That helped.
Rory had a performance thing at school on Thursday. There were heaps of kids in it that we knew, including Bob's son Nico (the whole extended family were there), my PC World Editor (her son goes to the school), plus the Cohens and masses of soccer people. Rory did very well, played the drums quite boringly then let rip a couple of times which was way better than some of the other drummers. He wore the bird mask that I helped Ross Cole do last year for the school production. It is getting a bit tight on him, but still looks like a pretty good prop.
Got a nice letter from the guy in prison thanking me for my response. Silly how little things make you feel good.
I think Brett celebrates a birthday this week on the 7th in Perth, where they are busily checking out Murrilitheran's action at the university using completely ridiculous methods that were used in filming LOTR (lots of dodgy bowling actions in those movies, I was saying so just the other day). Somebody said that filming a dodgy bowler in controlled conditions with little lights stuck to him is like sitting a convicted criminal next to a VCR and saying he isn't guilty if it's still there in the morning. What absolute bollocks. He's a cheat.
My business partner, Peter, turned 40 on Saturday. We've been working together for like 14 years. Am I getting old or is my memory getting better? The cook was obviously a serial one, not parallel, as the mains for 13 people arrived one after the other and the guy next to me had basically finished his by the time Diana's arrived. That being said, it meant those not eating could talk and vice versa when the other meals arrived. Not sure it was deliberately planned that way.
Gavin broke his thumb on Wednesday night and bought a business on Thursday. Busy 24 hours for him, really. Then, on Sunday, he told the vendor he could stick his business up his wazoo if he wasn't going to cooperate during the due diligence phase, and fair enough too. It's like a soap opera, without the kissing and unwanted pregnancies but lots of evil people and big money deals.
Charles felt that Rory's story on the trip to Glinks was excellent, and he suggested that Rory got his writing skill from his mother. I hear he's coming over for a visit. I can hit him then.
The Goodins have acquired another kitten, very small, and a bit overwhelmed yesterday but starting to settle down. Polly is cat-sized now and a bit scary for it (called Molly but not sure how long for). Our kids had a rare swim (this summer) in the Goodins pool. Diana played Thelma and Louise with Kathryn on Saturday when they went to see an art exhibition by the mother of one of Rory's friends in Kath's new convertible beetle. I took it for a little drive with a bunch of kids in it, it's quite nice to drive (even with three kids in it). Rory asked if he could have a go (god loves a tryer). Nothing like having the old top down. Luckily, I didn't go on the motorway or bugs would have been hitting me in the forehead. It's not red, though (only two colours of cars, red and not red).
Rory told us a very good little joke he got from school:
Q: How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Two, but don't ask me how they get inside.
Response from one person was, yes, but they'd be really screwed if someone turned the light on.
I am sure there were a couple of other things I was supposed to mention.
There always is.
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